Battle of the Dursts
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Robert Durst
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Name
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Fred Durst
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He was hiding from the media regarding the last murder he didn’t commit, when he didn’t commit another murder.
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Known AsEDGE - Robert
Oh you are in a band huh? Well people I don’t like just seem to go away… |
Asshat front man of Rap/rock group Limp Bizkit.
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God - who else could get him out of these situations?
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FriendsEDGE - Robert
Brittney Spears doesn’t return my calls either Fred. |
No one. By trying to retain even a little media spotlight, Fred has seemed to offend every single person on the face of the earth.
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The Galveston D.A.
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FoesEDGE - Fred
I hate to do it, but I have to give this one to Fred. Anyone who can get everyone to hate him has some real dedication. |
Everyone Durst has claimed to have slept with and everyone who “hates on” him. In other words…everyone.
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Hacksaw - to dismember bodies.
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Weapon of ChoiceEDGE - Robert
No explanation necessary. |
Microphone - to shout threatening lyrics about dismembering bodies.
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“I like dying better. Killed implies like I killed him. I did not kill him.”
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Catch PhraseEDGE - Fred
Fred, I think we can all identify with you for once. |
“I did it all for the nookie.”
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WINNER - I thought it would be a Robert Durst blowout, but surprisingly Fred proves to be a worthy opponent. I say we put these two together in a situation comedy. One man shuns media attention……the other seeks it out. Imagine the wacky misadventures. NBC, CBS? Does anybody hear me? C’mon……FOX? This would be better than most of your crap!
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